I’ve written a lot over the past three years on the topic of sobriety and why I think it’s one of the raddest things ever. It is undeniably the foundational decision that has led to every accomplishment, joy, and triumph I’ve had since.

Making the decision to remove alcohol completely from my lifestyle was not an easy one. I faced a ton of head-trash and social programming that had long convinced me to stay stuck in my patterns. If you’ve been considering giving up alcohol, you’ve probably had a similar fear-based track reeling in your head:

• Who will I be as a non-drinker?

• How will I have a social life if I don’t drink?

• What will I do at weddings? Parties? Happy Hour? Vacation?

• How will I relax after a long day? Celebrate after a big win at work?

When it comes to navigating the world alcohol-free, the struggle is absolutely real.

For years, I’d get the Sunday Scaries. That feeling of anxiety that set in when I started to think about going back to reality after the weekend. I’d have a sense of sadness and dread. It would be difficult to wind down and fall asleep on Sunday night. The anxiety would spill over into Monday morning as I’d trudge back into the office...have you been there?

Typically, I’d be fading out of a hangover that started at happy hour on Friday night. I’d meet up with my other young, successful contemporaries and we’d lament about the workweek with a few cocktails, eventually staying up until the late hours of the evening. 

Often, we’d each rise the next morning feeling less-than stellar and start a plan to meet up for brunch (read: mimosas and bloody Mary’s) to quell our hangovers, perhaps repeating the entire saga for Saturday night.

I never questioned this process...it’s just what single people in their 20s and 30s did. We were all successful, properly functioning people who’d unwind and celebrate the week by tying it on hard during the weekend...again, I ask: Have you been there?

If so, let me share my two-part antidote for beating the Sunday Scaries with you. But first, let me warn you that my approach goes against the grain just a bit. But, if you’re curious and brave and have even the tiniest bit of a feeling you are meant for something extraordinary in this life, I invite you to keep reading with an open mind.

Today - September 29th, 2019 - is my 1000th day free from alcohol. I’ll be honest, I don’t track my days anymore because not drinking is just part of my lifestyle...it’s just something I don’t do. Miraculously, it’s also something I don’t have any desire to do...I never thought I’d be here.

Real talk: I’m not a seasoned travler. I spent my summers in the Midwest going on weekend driving vacations. I didn’t get on a plane until graduate school and didn’t leave the country until after I’d turned 30. I’m only just getting into the groove when it comes to knowing what types of travel I’m into. Sometimes, travel seems intimidating and I’ve been grateful to have so many willing travel buddies to guide me and share experiences with me over the past few years.

In the last few months, however, I’ve really been slipping into a season of introversion and desiring to spend more time with myself and those with whom I have really close soul connections. When it became quite obvious recently that it was time for a getaway, I made the conscious choice to travel alone. I booked a last minute trip to Tulum, Mexico (read more about my travel experience and recommendations here) with the clear intention of reconnecting with my intuition, which I’d lost sight of during a recent season of business.

How a Breakup with Booze & Boys Helped Me To Truly Love Myself

I walked into the dimly-lit theater and apprehensively took my seat. At 31, this was the first time I’d ever treated myself to a movie solo. My thirty-first year would be full of many firsts. This was my first of many dates with myself.

The catalyst behind this newfound relationship with little old me was born out of necessity. It was only a few months before that I’d made the decision to take a break from alcohol. A “party girl” in my 20s, I’d had a sudden sense that my life might be better without it. So, as terrified as I was to navigate the world without a substance that had given me the confidence to date in the first place, I listened to my intuition and broke up with booze.

Little did I know that eliminating alcohol from my life would fuel one of the most intense and important periods of personal growth I’m sure I will experience in my lifetime.

…And Three Tough Questions I Had To Ask Myself

My name is Amanda. I’m a single, social, thirty-something living in Austin, TX. I’m also alcohol-free. I describe my journey as “spontaneous sobriety” because I didn’t identify as having a “drinking problem” (though, as you’ll read, that doesn’t mean my drinking wasn’t a problem).

A former social drinker (read: party girl), I’ve candidly discussed my alcohol-free lifestyle quite a bit over the last few years. What I haven’t shared in detail is how much I struggled as social or “gray area” drinker.

My name is Amanda and I am a recovering people pleaser“yes” person, and be everywhere / do everything gal. Saying “no” makes me feel kind of uncomfortable. Case in point: I recently made the conscious choice to say “no” to a seemingly simple request. Saying “yes” would have been the easy, people-pleaser thing to do, but I’ve been working really hard to become protective of my time and, based on my own criteria, the request was a “no”.

Since I’m (always) being honest, I’ll admit that I didn’t handle the “no” very gracefully...I felt compelled to explain myself and when the other person wouldn’t take “no” for an answer... I snapped (eek). Losing my cool is a sure sign that I have some reflection to do (I know, I know; we’re all human, but I am human who has gotten freaking good at self-reflection and unpacking things that disrupt my good vibes).

How to make the most of the single life & prepare yourself for the relationship you want. 

I can attest that as I've become more intentional with how I spend my time as a single gal, I've become more understanding and aware of why this time exists. To say I'm grateful would be an understatement. My singleness has provided me with tremendous opportunities for personal growth; I've accepted them all as graciously as possible. I know, with certainty that this time has made me a stronger individual and prepared me to be more present in all areas of life; especially to be a better partner. As a result, I know I have a lot to give and will add value to all relationships - romantic or not - and I seek for the same in others.

...And Why I Wonder If They’re Changing Modern Dating For the Worst

Last week, I deleted all dating apps off of my phone...this isn’t the first time. It isn’t that I’m not interested in dating or finding “the one,” I simply couldn’t commit to the dating lifestyle that I felt dating apps encourage or the energy-investment they required. I’ll begin by saying, I think I have one of the most optimistic outlooks on life out of anyone you might meet. For the most part, I approach life from a glass half full, sunshine and rainbows, anything is possible, the Universe is working in your favor point of view. But, I’ve also committed to cutting out or minimizing behaviors, habits, and relationships that don’t contribute to the positive-energy, high-vibe, mindful lifestyle I strive to live.