And Why Is It Such A Problem?

My teacher, Jolene Park (and notable expert on the topic) defines gray area drinking as “the space between the extremes of rock bottom and every-now-and-again drinking.” 

A few years ago, I found myself fumbling through the gray area, not quite sure why I was doing all-the-things, yet unable to get the results I wanted in my life. From the outside, it looked like I had it all together. I was an intelligent, successful, attractive, fit, high-achieving woman. I had a good job, car, house...you know the story. But, on the inside, I was secretly questioning my relationship with alcohol. Maybe you’ve found yourself in the gray area too...do any of these sound familiar?…

How I Feel Being Around Drinkers As An Alcohol-Free Advocate

If you’re currently alcohol-free or on the path of sober curiosity, you’re bound to have others inquire as to how you feel about being around other people who are drinking. While I encourage you to form your own opinions and feelings on the topic, I wanted to share my perspective because it’s evolved quite a bit during my time as a non-drinker).

Here’s the short version: I don’t mind if other people drink around me. I’m not a prohibitionist and I’m not at all triggered by alcohol (I gave it up by choice and truly no longer desire it). I’m genuinely not bothered if people are drinking around me, but my opinion now has more layers than that. I have a more developed narrative of thoughts that run through my head depending on the type of drinkers and scenes I’m around. This is how I break it down:

For years, I’d get the Sunday Scaries. That feeling of anxiety that set in when I started to think about going back to reality after the weekend. I’d have a sense of sadness and dread. It would be difficult to wind down and fall asleep on Sunday night. The anxiety would spill over into Monday morning as I’d trudge back into the office...have you been there?

Typically, I’d be fading out of a hangover that started at happy hour on Friday night. I’d meet up with my other young, successful contemporaries and we’d lament about the workweek with a few cocktails, eventually staying up until the late hours of the evening. 

Often, we’d each rise the next morning feeling less-than stellar and start a plan to meet up for brunch (read: mimosas and bloody Mary’s) to quell our hangovers, perhaps repeating the entire saga for Saturday night.

I never questioned this process...it’s just what single people in their 20s and 30s did. We were all successful, properly functioning people who’d unwind and celebrate the week by tying it on hard during the weekend...again, I ask: Have you been there?

If so, let me share my two-part antidote for beating the Sunday Scaries with you. But first, let me warn you that my approach goes against the grain just a bit. But, if you’re curious and brave and have even the tiniest bit of a feeling you are meant for something extraordinary in this life, I invite you to keep reading with an open mind.